Tag: Putin
-
The Truth Is Out There
The Bunnington Post newsroom has decided to launch its own investigation into the effect of a Brexit on life in the UK. The propaganda machines have been doing overtime in the Leave and Remain camps and we’re frankly more than a little annoyed that no-one so far has addressed the following questions: Will a Brexit…
-
Bouffe assassinated – does slipper belong to Putin?
From our reporter – No arrests have been made over the assassination of Bouffe in the early hours of this morning. Multiple theories exist about what is believed to be the murder weapon, a slipper. Who killed Bouffe? It is a question plastered across newspapers and billboards across the world today, as forensic experts work…
-
Putin’s bombers
Well, mes chers amis, things have been busy of late. As you know I have a lot of responsibilities leading BAFFLED Labs to greatness while also managing my terrible-but-improving staff at home. Then there is of course the responsibility to counsel and support celebrities – thankfully shared with my dear friends and colleagues Haas and Katrijn – and…
-
2014 in pictures
January February March April May June July August September October November December The Bunnington Post Award for Vilest & Most Revolting Politician of the Year 2014 goes to Vladimir Putin Whose name shall henceforth only be spelled in poo-coloured font. May 2015 bring freedom and justice for man and…
-
Cold War II
Dave, ma’e. If Gorby texts ter say a new Col’ War is on da books, take da man seersly, yeah. ‘e ended da las’ one while you were still tryin’ ter control yer testosterone levels by pullin’ pafe’ic pranks at da Bullin’don Club wif yer measly ma’es. An’ while we’re on da topic: A cold…
-
Ankle biting
Allez, mes amis. Back to work. As you know I always have my ear to the ground on matters of importance. Guess where I am today? Eh? Eh?? OK, a visual clue. Still nothing? OK… THere they have been having a bit of a Dalek problem lately, hence some rather naff security measures. Finally… Yes,…
-
Not in front of the heavies
Pe’al. Come to Haas. Haas… No, not now. Go away, please Awww, you look so fluffy an’ sof’. Ah jus’ wan’ ter cuddle. Jus’ one li”le cuddle. You know you want i’ hey-hey-hey Haas! This isn’t some seedy music video by a 15 second has-been. Bugger off. OFF, Haas! Look at that – have you…
-
Putin’s heavies come calling
[Waitress] Haas? … Haas! [Katrijn] He’s busy. What is it? [Waitress] There’s some security staff at the door asking for Haas. They sound a bit Russian. […] [Waitress] Haas! [Katrijn] He says, put them in the shed with the other ones.
-
Putin’s Poroshenko problem
ORRITE, Puters? […] Yeah, Ahll ‘ave ter keep i’ shor’ Vlad, on accoun’ of da wife no’ likin’ me talkin’ ter you ma’e. […] Nah, i’s’s no’ abaht us goin’ thru our bi-curious phase togevva an’ she da jealous type. I”s da fact dat you are a Russian dicta’or wot makes ‘er umconfor’able. Yeah? An’…
-
Putin’s nightmare mayor
Haas. Snarf, mah pe’al? That’s your Skype ringing. Hm? Oh bollocks. It’s ‘im. Da Impaler Better answer that. His heavies will have told him you’re just lounging. No excuse for not answering Vlad. ORRITE … Sochi. Yeah. Ah’ve ‘eard of it. Ter do wif sports, innit? Erlimpic sumfink or ova. …! Wot? Rainbows? …!? Gay…
The Bunnington Post 