Tag: Bouffe
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My waiter is over the ocean
My waiter has disappeared. I wait by the door for his return but I have not seen him for two days. Also, he normally uses the front door, but that is not the point. The point is to publish dramatic pictures of my suffering to at least induce guilt, if not the hasty purchase of…
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Poll: why does Bouffe have a headtilt?
Answers in the comments below for a chance to win a bag of Bunnington Post fertiliser! Why does Bouffe have a headtilt? Was it: A bungineering accident A bungled Putin assassination The latest fashion, daaaahling Something else, to be precise:…
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Not fazed. Nope
I’ll take your Hoover and raise you three sticky cecotropes trod into your short shag rug and left overnight.
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Bouffe assassinated – does slipper belong to Putin?
From our reporter – No arrests have been made over the assassination of Bouffe in the early hours of this morning. Multiple theories exist about what is believed to be the murder weapon, a slipper. Who killed Bouffe? It is a question plastered across newspapers and billboards across the world today, as forensic experts work…
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Bouffe Exclusive: My Headtilt Story
BOUFFE REVEALS THE TRUTH BEHIND HIS HEADTILT ORDEAL – “My world was turned upside down overnight. I owe everything to kale” His publicist sweeps into the room in an undisclosed location enveloped in a cloud of Eau de Bouffe aftershave, and apologises for keeping us waiting for over three hours. Picking off small flecks of…
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Bouffe baffles boffins
From our reporter Scientists at MIT continue to be intrigued by Bouffe’s dexterity and nimbleness after successfully adjusting to his severe head tilt. Unexplained achievements have been recorded in a controlled environment designed to map the effects of living at a 90 degree angle with 15% of the body while 85% continues to function level…
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Uppy eared
Alors mes chers amis, As you can see I have been very busy lately. Running one’s own consultancy means a lot of responsibility when it comes to innovation, experimentation and self-improvement. Alors. I have decided to pursue my life-long dream of becoming an uppy-eared rabbit. The reason is that uppy eared rabbits seem more popular with the…
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Noisy eating contest: Coffee vs Bouffe
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B for Bouffe
Eh bien mes amis, I have started the year by resolving to do more bungineering, branch out further into bunstruction and put my talents to use in interior decoration. An excellent combination, quoi? Especially for you my production team has produced the below reportage of me putting my personal stamp on my living space, to…
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Festive chilling
So. Advanced chilling was practiced chez Bouffe this Christmas. Most days I lounged for around 22 hours a day and occasionally twitched my nose or moved my whiskers. A few times I rolled onto my back to have my tummy rubbed by my staff for a bit of variety. The remaining time was spent doing…
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