Yeah. Haas ‘ere. ‘ello. Pron’o! Moshi moshi! … ? Oi! Speak up willya, can’ ‘ear a fink like dis.
…
Mi’ mah ma’e.
…
Nah, is a figgere of speach orrite, Ahm not yer ma’e, so don’ get carried away ova a bi’ o’ ‘ybrid Pira’es o’ Penzance/Cockney Rhymin’ Slang
…
Is blowin’ a gale over dere you say?
…
Messin’ wif yer ‘air. Innerferin’ wif yer pressedenhiul elleshiun campaign.
…
Mah Katrijn finks i”s nuffink ter do wif da win’. Is da Berlusconi hair wot is da problem, geddit? Or pollissy…
…
Yea she got technique orrite. Styles me fluff each mornin’ fer me, mah Katrijn does…
…
Orrite. ‘ere’s a tutorial, if ya stop callin’ me ‘mate’.
Step 1
Get yer wife ter groom yer top.
Step 2
Repea’ Step 1
Step 3
Repea’ Step 2
Step 4
Repea’ step 3
[blip] ‘ang on. Pic downloadin’
Dat yer wife? ‘s OK. Each ter ‘is own, eh?
The Bunnington Post 