The Bunnington Post: 2011 is the Year of the Rabbit. How will your influence be felt this year?
Haas: Ah predict da Prime Minista is goin’ ter grow long ears ter increase ‘is poli’ical cre’ibili’y. 1 up an ‘ 1 down ear. Dat’s ‘ow Ahm goin’ ter revolutionise poli’ics in 2011.
Katrijn: And a beard.
Haas: An’ a beard, yea. Can only be an improvement, knowwhaddAhmean?
TBP: What about Ed Milliband?
Haas: Wot abaht ‘im? ‘e’s cost me a perfec’ly good iFone dat one, Ah go’ no time fer ‘im rite nah.
TBP: Where do you think he should go next?
Haas: Turn left an’ jus’ keep walkin’ Ed, da’s it, jus’ keep goin’…
TBP: Delores. 2010 was an interesting year in style terms. What do you think the Year of the Rabbit will do in the sartorial department?
Delores: I can see new trends emerging – the stick insect look will return if unemployment keeps rising. Famines will be du jour… Are we listening, Mr Osborne? After all the progress we made in 2010 we simply cannot afford to go back to the size zero debacle.
Katrijn: Quite. And nor do we want to see dark circles from sleepless nights induced by anything other than hard partying – or make up.
TBP: Which gadgets are going to be big in 2011?
Delores: Obvs the Breakfast App on iPad.
Haas: Ahm ge”in’ me own limi’ed edition HaasPad by Apple, only Ah can” discuss anyfink more de’ailed rite nah fer contrac’ual reasons. Steve told me ter keep me gob shu’.
Katrijn: I hope Bunnifrey will release an improved Cloaking Device for Bink. He’s had one too many set backs in 2010, he really deserves a break.
TBP: What about you, Bink?
Bink: Huh?
Oh.
Er, I’m taking up smoking?
The Bunnington Post 