Help please!

Delores. We are not being looked after properly! Look at us, left to perish with only an empty food bowl for company. The world needs to learn the truth about our ordeal, our fans have a right to know, they will stage a rescue operation for certain.

Honey, move to your right a bit for that pap there, I think some of the pellets you’re trying to cover up will still be visible at that angle!

Oh damn, I think I may have left a half-eaten carrot out there somewhere… Now, where is it?

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Spill your beans here - you know you want to!

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