2010 style disasters

Anything Katrijn can do, I can do more stylish. Behold, dear fans, my 2010 overview of style mishaps, horrors and plain disasters.

1. Fake fur

What’s with the obsession with everything fake, from Swarovski crystals to Tommy Sheridan to fake bake to synthetic fur? Either you are blessed with the real thing by Mother Nature or you don’t even think about it. End of.

2. Symmetry

How very boring. Do you want to be a conformist? ‘Nuff said.

3. Skinny arses

Come on ladies, live a little. Have another mince pie and get those mudflaps going! The virtues of the generous bottae have been immortalised in many a poem, from Queen to Spinal Tap, so what are you waiting for?

And no, you are not taking out gym membership in January. 2011 is going to be all about behinds the size of two bowling balls.

4. Leopard print

Hello?! Who came up with this daft trend? Are we in the Serengeti or something? Vile, vile, vile.

My forecast for 2011 – stripes. Mark my words. Zebra if you must. As long as they are not symmetrical!

5. Contrast

Entirely with Katrijn on this one. One does not want to stick out like a sore thumb in one’s natural environment. Sorry, Gaga. Totally missed the point there, but that’s to be expected from a beginner, hein? At least she’s cottoned on to the big bottom trend already.