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Yeah, so, I came ‘ome last Friday orrite, and I’m jus’ really pleased ter be back ‘n all, finkin’, all … More

Harumph

I’ve officially ‘ad enough, dis bun wants ter go ‘ome. So they took da pink earrin’ off, well, ‘ere’s a … More

Mr Pink

Blimey! No, fings ain’t da dice an’ play they are supposed ter be. It’s all downright alarming, frankly! I mean, … More

Redecorating

Oh dear. I know she means well when she positions the sun screen so that we don’t get overheated in … More

Gimme Giant Dandelion

Tell you wot, if me neighbour Delores says I should give da Giant Dandelion a go, I believe ‘er. The … More

Bearded lady

Mefinks da benefits ov ‘avin’ married a bearded lady are plentiful. For one, one ‘as someplace ter find one’s cuddles … More

Recovery room

Listen, hun. If your man buggers off to California ‘on business’, not my problem. Hands off my man. Baby food, … More

Apple tart

Awright geeezzaa! Lately I ‘aven’t been feelin’ as perky. Ten sure what da matter is but somehow me skinner doesn’t … More